Bakery Humor Appreciator Pillows

Damaged goods & lawyer's torts 50 off.

Important Food Groups

Cake Free Zone

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

"Scientists may need a trillion dollar atom smasher to explore the fundamental questions of the universe, but all you need is one too many."

'Remember, my door is always open Higgins, just be careful of the trap door.'

'If you're out of quarterly earnings, I'll take the assets and liabilities breakdown.'

'Look, Mum, those loaves have had some babies!'

"It's choux pastry, not shoe pastry!"

Where cronuts come from.

"Bah! in my day bands knew how to play their computers properly. Like Kraftwerk"

"Look, Mommy. Puppy already knows a trick! What should we call him?" "How about 'Scooter.'"

"I'm your surrogate mother, son. I just provided the oven."

Placier.

"Do you want to order a contract killing, Don Carlos, or a pay-as-you-go killing?"

Baker

Could you be a little bit more specific than an 'arm and a leg'?

"You can't define me as a man or as a woman. . . I'm transginger."

"Management think staff need to use their initiative more, and they forwarded a 65 page memo on how they want you to do it."

"Why didn't you think of that before I put on the icing?"

He's going to help us with our late payers' problem.

Peripheral vision cow

"It's an old family recipe - some flour and water, yeast, a little salt, mono calcium phosphate, polysorbate 60, calcium propionate..."

"I married a girl with two mums and ended up with two mothers-in-law."

I slept funny last night!

'Please, no - not the live fettucini!'

One of their favourite games was to pull the wool over their eyes.

'Make Mother's Day shopping a piece of cake.'

'The thought of your biscuits brings a lump to my throat.'

"How many, 'This will go right to my hips' in a jelly donut?"

Little Grannies Homebaked Cookies.

Grazer's block

'My father and mother never argue. My father doesn't live here.'

"Gosh grandma, you must be over a million in dog years!"

'Do you want to buy this cow from 'Windy Field Farm'?'