Backyard Pillows

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

"Careful. That house has a taser."

"I don't think you can call two ants a 'bug safari'."

Bird Bath.

"At first I was concerned about the Earth opening up. But I was going to build a fire pit, so it actually saved me a lot of time."

'Propane ran out.'

"How?"

"Lovely robin ... though, I'm sensing a little attitude."

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

"He thinks he learned a new trick - I don't have the heart to tell him it's just an old trick he forgot he knew."

Human males marking territory.

'Hey, look�The carnival must be in town'

"He burns the first one as a sacrifice to the barbecue gods."

'I would love to play in your tree-house, but I can't climb trees...'

Boy: 'DAD, the lawnmower's started SMOKING again!'

"What … have … you … done?"

Living next door to area 51

Barbecue: Touch the Chef Inappropriately!

Strikeout Dog

'Oh, yeah? Wanna bet my Dad has more passwords than your Dad?'

Barbecue salesman pointing at cooker - "Top of the line."

George can overreact when people criticise his barbecues.

"See? I told you our yard was too small for a swing set."

'My guess is, you might be running the jets too high...'

'Don't give me that! I know for a fact, he was in my flowerbeds!!'

'Everyone called and canceled for tonight's dinner party? Awesome!'

"Why is that moron screaming so loud at something that isn't there?"

"He likes his bones smoked."

"Did you get some work done?"

Brad! Who's that singer I cry to when I'm drunk?