Babywearing Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Dude, you should wear it on the front. Chicks love that!"

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

'Does yours come with a trampoline?'

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

Maternity Ward

'I'm afraid this doubles your bill.'

'How many fingers do you see?'

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - you'll run it off during the toddler years.'

'He was getting too heavy to carry around in my pouch.'

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

Open other end

"Sure was a lot of screaming for the happiest day of your life."

Uterus: One size fits all.

Bouncing baby

Giving Birth

Maternity Hospital

'We got Spot and Fluffy when it rained cats and dogs. You came in a baby shower.'

'You're up the duff with a bun in the oven.'

Baby Carriers

'Well, he certainly has his Father's vocabulary.'

'If he starts early enough, he could be the next Rory Mcilroy.'