Baby Bump Aficionado T-Shirts

"Don't you dare ask me again...ARE WE THERE YET??"

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

'I felt it put it's little boot in then!'

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

Maternity Ward

'I'm afraid this doubles your bill.'

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

'BEEP! BEEP! Pregnant Lady Reversing!...'

Uterus: One size fits all.

First Steps

'How many fingers do you see?'

'Mom is feeling sick. She caught a baby.'

Bouncing baby

'You're up the duff with a bun in the oven.'

Maternity Hospital

'We got Spot and Fluffy when it rained cats and dogs. You came in a baby shower.'

Giving Birth

Ultra Sound/Downloading.