Baby Adorers Pillows

"Oh, he's cute, all right, but he's got the temperament of a car alarm."

A midwife holding a baby

'The child is very illogical'

"Someday she'll solve the world's problems."

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

Snowmobull

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

'We'll need lots of nappy changes today, the T. V. just said it's going to be wet and windy.'

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

celebrating a birth.

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

Doughboy Dad

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

"They look so young and helpless."

'You see, we don't have any children, so he's kind of our baby.'

"Here's our little bundle of joy."

"He looks just like your husband."

Maternity Ward

"I wish they'd never discovered fertility drugs!"

"And remember, it's important to wake them up at hourly intervals."

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

'How many fingers do you see?'