Awkwardness Enthusiast Pillows

"All in favor of telling Anderson about that thing stuck to his lip, say aye."

Stilted Conversation.

'Maybe we could save appendectomy scars until the second date!'

'At the end the tunnel, my parents were waiting to greet me. Mom looked nice, but as usual, Dad was walking around in his underwear. I nearly died.'

Bob had a lot to prove – which happens when you're wrong most of the time.

"He's at the age where he's a little embarrassed to be out with a parent."

"You smell like wet cardboard."

"Dude, you saw your dad naked in the bathroom."

'You've got to wonder what goes on in their heads...'

Son, it's time you learned about the birds and the bees and the dung beetles

Well, I told you she fancied me!

D*mn it.

"You're a very interesting waiter, but don't you have any other tables to take care of?"

"God help us, it's that guy."

"Help! I don't know how to leave a conversation!"

"This is a little embarrassing but I'm afraid I've forgotten your name."

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

'I think it's damn unprofessional for a dermatologist to scream 'Yikes' like that.'

"Well, this isn't really going anywhere if you don't like public displays of affection."

Always an awkward moment when you meet a Dung Beetle...

"Oh, great, there are the Cardwells. Bet you they try to talk to us about their levitating cube."

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"If you think the first half of this psychological test is intrusive, wait until you're grilled by me mother."

"Humiliation is a very important part of the the process, Mr. Keifer."

Man leaves sperm bank. Woman says: 'Thanks, do come again.'

"Don't make eye contact. Don't make eye contact. Don't...."

"You look like the kind of folks who laugh at adversity."

"Baldo, we need to talk."

"On a scale of 1-10, how painfully awkward is this?"

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

"I think that one is a little too honest."

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"