Awkward Situations Aficionado T-Shirts

Colin had read that women liked men who asked them questions about themselves.

'Hello?...Tes, hello Dr. Stein... mm hmm...I see...how contagious?'

"Hold the elevator!"

'You're asking ME to go out on a date with YOU?!' 'Well, basically, but without the incredulity.'

'Excuse me! My eyes are up here!'

'Would you say you were sexually frustrated at all?'

"I've found it, Fred-'Impotency gone for ever'...."

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."

Bad Interview Technique

"If you think the first half of this psychological test is intrusive, wait until you're grilled by me mother."

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"You and your daft inventions."

"Ignore the screams, sir. I'll get a new fork."

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

Baldo's How to Be Uncool: No. 5. Forget how hot the coffee is while you're thinking how cool you look sitting in a coffee shop.

"If that girl sent over a double cappuccino, maybe you should go talk to her!"

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

Chatty, garlic-coffee breath, apathetic, contagious

"Let’s try another one. Jerry blinked, Kate’s giving Jon the finger, and Jess is choking."

Spinach Dating.

A close encounter of the awkward kind

'I should warn you, I charge double if you want me to examine both of them, Mrs. Jacobs.'

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

'Maybe you need to practice walking.'

'Excuse me, Mr. Pavlik, but that gentleman you called an idiot is here. Should I still say you're not in?'

'Don't you hate people who blatantly use office parties to network?'

"Michael. ... That's my sleazeball of an ex-husband's name."

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"But he's no longer with us."

'I hope I'm not intruding...'

"So, have you two been doing anything reproductive?"

Lion Toupee

"Look, I know Estella has a boyfriend. I would never try to break them up. But it's not illegal to text friends...and we're still friends..."

'You're not what we hand in mind when we advertised for a new organist.'