Awkward Encounters Appreciator T-Shirts

'...and bring a friend. If you have one...'

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

'We've got a special this week on nose hairs!'

"Ma'am, why don't you go ahead of me?" "Um... no thanks. Let's let this gentleman go ahead of us." "Oh, no... you ladies go right ahead!"

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"Dig deep! C'mon! You got this!"

Whilst browsing in his local flea market, Jimmy has an awkward encounter with an ex.

'Today's unwilling nude model is Ralph.'

'Maybe you need to practice walking.'

'I should warn you, I charge double if you want me to examine both of them, Mrs. Jacobs.'

"And with that being said Polly became dinner." "Polly wanna cracker?" "Polly wanna piece of yo mama's sweet behind." "Oh boy..."

Road sign with a dinosaur.

"It's an adjustment being a handshake guy in a fist-bump company."

Turtle Blind dates

'Don't look now but it's that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped,'

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"I really think I can handle this date on my own."

Colin had heard that women liked honesty in men.

"It's not you, Glen—it's your ex-wife. She's behind me, isn't she?"

"But he's no longer with us."

"I made a big mistake getting into ladies underwear..."

'I've never felt like this on a first date, Tom, you're suffocating me.'

'Boy...it can be awkward meeting the parents for the first time.'

'Hi, I'm Sheldon, and I want to speak to you about perception management!'

Rudy, I went out on a date last night. It was a miserable failure. Sorry. As my employee, you've seen me day in and day out. You know me better than anyone. Rudy, do I, your boss and sole source of income, have some personality flaw? Or did the fault lie with my date. Feel free to speak candidly. Mother.

'I don't know anything about art and I don't know what I like.'

The originator of the office birthday party.

'En-counter'

"Just don't be yourself."

'Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.'

Massage Mushroom Cloud

"Janet, we have to stop meeting like this. It has become a source of increasing friction in my marriage to Elizabeth."

'Gail, my dear, please don't talk about sex - my God this is a restaurant!'

"Play coy if you like, but no one can resist a perfectly symmetrical face."