Award Critic T-Shirts

The turner committee hated my entry..but the envelope made the shortlist.

"Bond James, Bond."

You're my Mona Lisa.

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Benedict Cumberbatch

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"You've got a long, long road ahead of you, young man."

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Herman Mankiewicz

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

"Now Playing: One of those Jane Austen movies."

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

'This should be perfect. The main characters fall in love during a series of explosions.'

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Use your imagination.

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Well....I could've done this!"

"Personally, I'm a doer."

"I may not know much about art, but I do know what's suitable for framing."

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'