Aviation Safety Gifts

"Phew! I narrowly avoided a near miss!"

Santa's Near Miss

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

'What zip code are we in now?'

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

UK border controls relaxed.

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

Servicemen.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'Can our software do that?'

Airport Security.

WW2 fighter pilot with emoji kills

"Chaplain, the lord should put warning labels on some of his creations."

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

Walking Luggage.

Man using to much bug spray

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"Someone must love someone very much indeed."

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

"He built his own airplane from a kit."

Pilot with champagne.

'Why can't you admit you're lost?'

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

'What's with the overnight bag, Orville?'

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

Cow Blue Arrows

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."