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Why doesn't birdie go soaring on high like other birds?

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

So you're a mocking bird...

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

Bird Torture.

Birds of the Pacific Northwest: Belted Kingfisher

Wanted For Bird Watching: Reward

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

'There's too many of us... I'm going to start forming a 'W'.'

Why would birdie need newspaper?

'I think he's lonely.'

"We don't observe 'casual Fridays' here."

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

"Could you keep still?"

"Yes, go and play, but be careful, there are a few thermals around: make sure you're not lifted too high..."

"Homosapius amorius... the common lovebirds."

"I don't actually talk, I just mimic sounds."

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

No caption (A crash test dummy in the shape of a bird flies toward a window. Other birds dressed as scientists study the experiment from the ground).

"He was into feet, but, unforunately, not duck feet."

"Do you think the birds like me?"

Giraffe Portrait

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.