Avatar Aficionado Gifts

'The dating agency matched me up with my avatar.'

'According to the latest polling, the Ronald Reagan avatar is the leading candidate with voters over 60.'

Computer Dating Service: Be Careful What You Wish For!

"That's his online avatar...the off-line version is over here."

"Instagram, Facebook, tic tok but who is the real ME?"

You're my Mona Lisa.

Copycats

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

Madonna of the Pukes.

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

Paul Klee

"She's been so creative lately."

Cariactures

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

(Camel paintings)

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

German Expressionist Breakfast

"An unfortunate museum gift shop." "Banksy activity set." "Jackson Pollock coloring book." "MC Escher building blocks." "Claes Oldenburg miniatures." "Marceau Marceau CDs." "Seurat's connect-the-dots aaAAAAA."

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

"Mr. Right!"

If nobody had invented graphics

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'

Horti-Culture

Distractions Of The Great

Baroque Peacock

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

"The derby is better. That makes you look like Abraham Lincoln."

"You're my Mona Lisa."

Spring Training