Automotive Pillows

'Safety zone ends, resume driving like idiots.'

"Gracie, just because you understand internal combustion engines...doesn't mean you can drive."

'We've found the problem...'

Although they knew it had no practical applications, they couldn't help but be jealous of Jeb's shiny new 19-wheeler.

"Perfect."

"I'm having a little difficulty adjusting. The last place I worked was a lot bigger."

"I agree, it's a lot of bang for the buck. And thumping, whining, clicking, clacking, clanging, grinding, buzzing and rattling."

"Your engine was running amok. We had to call in the authorities."

Traffic calming ahead. Prepare to be Mindful.

Perry became painfully aware of just how dangerous bald tires can be.

"I recommend the Safety-M2000. It's just loud enough to warn people you're coming."

'You always lift me up when I'm down.'

"Thanks for fixing the muffler."

'It's a hybrid.'

'Take her out for a spin, Guaranteed to blow your mind, Or at least your hair,'

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

'It's completely gutless. With all the money you save on speeding tickets it'll practically pay for itself.'

"Clear!"

Fast driver

'Did you say 39 or 93?'

'Yes, I did give it an oil change myself. I changed to a healthy low calorie oil with no transfats.'

'He was a darn fine mechanic.'

"This baby can take you from zero to cardiac arrest in 60 seconds!"

'I can dream, can't I?'

Gynaecologist standing under a patient (like a mechanic).

'She does about a hour on a full wind up.'

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

Snow Tire Sale: We Skid You Not

"No officer, I'm not concerned that my signal lights don't seem to be working. I never use the damned things."

"It's our new electric car. We call it the 'Volts Wagon'."

Bartlett's Unfamiliar Quotations

"Check the catalytic converter while you're in there, please."

Chip wagon oil change.

Al's Used Cars: Our Motto - when life hands you lemons, we sell them!

'I'm sorry. I just can't date a woman whose carbon footprint is bigger than mine.'