Automobile Safety T-Shirts

"Seat belts unfastened? Excellent."

"It's redesigned to handle rolling over."

"Ma'am, it's your husband. There's been an auto accident."

Crash test dummy has sign in rear of test car that says "Dummy On Board"

A 'failed' brake check!

Crash test dummy standing by his car.A sign on it says 'My other car is a write off'.

"I brought you a new car last year."

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

Please Drove Carefully.

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

Touring Cyclist

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

'That's hydroplaning for ya.'

Caution: ironic literal proverb ahead (fork in the road)

'Your Grounded!'

"Seriously Dad, it totally wasn't my fault."

Computer Controlled Car

Bedroom Traffic Control

'What the … ? How did those thugs get into my car?'

"I have to wear a bike helmet all the time after Mommie heard cars kill more pedestrians than cyclists!"

One Way - Yield

Knights Wing Mirrors.

"Being a crossing guard for a squirrel is exhausting!"

"Why'd the chicken cross the road?"

a crash-test dummy is performing some affirmations before going to work

'The new intelligent dummies aren't working out. They've figured out there's a break!'

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

Attention: Speed Troughs

"I've seen this before. Keep his head inside the car when the vehicle is in motion."

'Mom's always telling me to look both ways, don't talk to strangers, and change my passwords.'

"It helps prevent side collisions."

Vehicles waiting at a crossing for a tradesman's spirit level to pass.