Auto Service Worker T-Shirts

"Isn't that one of Mr. Ferguson's wheels?"

"I hope you don't mind, but I stuck in a little prayer for General Motors."

Our Cars Are Made By 100% American-Made Robots.

Stimulus bust

Auto Mechanic Birthdays

The average taxpayer will ultimately embrace the auto industry bailout. Hell, we sold em all that useless undercoating for all these years!

"Just to be clear, you want suicide doors installed on your hearse?"

"In my experience, cars with hyphens in their names are the best."

'For Pete's sake, Edward - You're a PINE BEETLE. It's a little late to go into the automotive trade now!...'

'Well,here's the answer to why your car has been running so rough in the mornings Mr.Tait...It's pregnant!'

'If you lose your electrical charge before you get to a recharge, you just wind this.'

NASCAR TIRE CHANGE

'More people will buy our cars if we become a carbon neutral company.'

'The president's speech on how well the recovery is going? Well, make a left at the abandoned mall, a right at the shuttered assembly plant, and a left at the closed steel mill...'

"Don't worry, man. President Trump will take care of us. . ."

"It means a chieftain tank of petrol."

"Oh, great, the warranty is up."

'That charge is for my accountant because this job is going to put me in a higher tax bracket.'

'Business has doubled since we organized that women's beach volleyball tournament across the street.'

General Motors.

"My dog chewed up my steering wheel. Then he started gnawing on my floor mats and now he bit off my seat belt. What do you recommend?"

"I had this weird nightmare. I dreamed I was a muffler! I woke up exhausted."

Where's the difference?

'In the off-season I generally do some hunting and fishing, help out in my father's auto showroom, have knee surgery, and work out in my hometown youth center.'

Limo Service.

'This may take more work than we thought.'

'Do you cover the deductible?'

"Do you sell backup cameras?"

Employee of the Month: Mr Wiggles.

"You're a lousy grocery store."

Union Label is Edsel

New Big Three bailout cars?

"Can you deliver that to me?"

Ed's Car Wash,

'C'mon... I just want to hug you!' - 'Arrrrrgh!'