Auto Care Adherent Gifts

"You need orthopedic brake shoes"

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Coexist. Coexhaust.

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

'Your mother makes a wonderful spoiler.'

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

Car wash / Mouth wash

I must be losing my grip, he didn't query the bill...

Man has applied car wax and sees the whole car melt in the sun.

"I told you not to polish the car too much."

"If they can rig emissions tests, why can't they fake crash tests too?"

A man and woman use oars from within their car.

'We auto mechanics get no respect!'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

Leopards do change their spots

22. Being tireless is good trait to have in most jobs, but not when you're working on a pit crew.

A 1950's Barber Shop

"Actually he only asked for a buff-up."

A mom watches as her children get into a large SUV using a staircase.

QUICK OIL CHANGE & FLU SHOT

"Honest, Dad, somethin's wrong with the lawnmower." "You look fine to me. When you finish the lawn and pullin weeds feel free to wash the car and paint the house."

"It's perfect for commuting to college. Definitely a learning experience."

'New! - 'Fuel Price Rage' counselor on duty.'

"OK, let's see. For starters, the guarantee only covers the muffler."

It started with a giggling sound in the suspension, then a noise in the ventilator, and then...

COWS: Spare cow

"Thank goodness for rear-engine cars!"

"Our smart car sent a text saying it went to the car wash to get all the winter salt off it. Did it also have to say because I was too lazy to do it?"

'I'm after a longer dipstick. This one doesn't reach the oil anymore.'

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

'Advice? Yep, take your Olympic torch somewhere else.'

'Last year, too many people were killed or injured by automobiles and trucks in the Northwest, many more than were killed or injured by cougars or wolves...'