Austen Admirer Pillows

"It's another letter from Mr. Wentworth. He writes, 'You up?' and then there are some pictures of a smiley face and an eggplant."

"You know, in Jane Austen's time a little well placed irony would have sufficed."

"So much for watching a Jane Austen movie with my date. He kept waiting for the car chase!"

Cut out and keep your own Jane Austen.

'I still don't understand why I couldn't use the path to get your Jane Austen stamps.'

Jane Austen.

Sense, Sensibility & Sid, Attorneys at Law. 'We cover all the bases.'

"My Mr Darcy!"

"You know what, 'Pride and Prejudice' is not at all what I was expecting, but I love it. . ."

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"This year we decided to vacation on the 3rd rock."

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

So you're a mocking bird...

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

Bird Torture.

'I know it's gassy...'

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

'There's too many of us... I'm going to start forming a 'W'.'

'I think he's lonely.'

Why would birdie need newspaper?

Love

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

"Greetings, Earthling. How are the schools?"

"I'm torn, Randy. I don't know what to think." "About what, little buddy?" "Star Trek. The last movie got rave reviews. Critics and audiences loved it. Therefore, I loved it too. But it didn't come anywhere close to earning $1 billion at the box office. And these days, any movie that doesn't earn $1 billion is a complete failure. Therefore, I must hate it. I'm in limbo until the hive mind comes to a consensus." "Except for honey, nothing good ever comes from hives."

"Do you think the birds like me?"

Why doesn't birdie go soaring on high like other birds?

"Never Again." (bird sitting on a giant egg).

Professor Tulp meets his match

'You had better eat those intestinal organs or there's no dessert for you!'

"Aaaaugh! It's the Zombie Alpacalypse!"

'Why do they call these conventions when everyone here is so unconventional?'