Auditory Escapist Pillows

'Ocean sounds won't be heard, so that we may bring you a paid commercial program on offshore investment opportunities.'

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

Audio Books

"Ding" "Dong"

'Man, I'm sick of thinking...can't someone flip on a T.V. or something?'

'Elaine, take a ditty.'

'What a day! My secretary was out, our biggest customer canceled a large order, the computer broke down, I didn't have any lunch, and leaving work I got stuck for an hour in the elevator with an 18 year old nympho with big breasts!'

'and for pushing your umbrella button in a VERY crowded elevator.'

Man trapped in bubble from bubble bath.

"Relax, Marge! I'm sure the folks at 'Ultimate Pirate Adventures'. . ."

"I won't lie to you: It was quite an ordeal to move the upright piano in..."

"Now. Hear. This."

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

"With this invention...I can finally go to a time where everyday nuisances have been completely eradicated!"

Message in a bottle.

Free Thinking.

'Tell me if this hurts.'

"The tide is out at the moment so here is some music while you are waiting..."

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

Daydreaming to other people's music on the train,

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

"You know, on second thought maybe I'll take the stairs."

Tortured by music

Sometimes you wanna go where nobody knows your name

'Only six more floors to my cubicle.'

"You're a very lucky man, Mr. David. Your insurance covers it."

"Move over! - I just got the bill!"

'I've got to go, Alice, you know how the boss frowns on personal calls.'

'A lovely area, but not enough waiters!'

Virtual Reality Check

'Faster, our past is catching up with us!'

The damage from wearing headphones.