Audio Equipment Gifts

"We tried six speakers, then twelve, and finally we put in the Pittsburgh Symphony, yet we still feel something is lacking."

Open Top Car Stereo volume control, 'irritate', 'annoy', 'enrage'

'You put a round thing on a spinning plate with a needle and then you play with buttons and knobs...only old people know how to do it.'

'But how do you download music?'

'Time of death: Two forty five pm. Cause of death: Surround Sound System.'

"You'd better stand back now: This is going to be a mighty roar..."

'WHAT?!' (people with headphones on).

Audio Books

'Can you tell me where the ON button is?"

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

Hi Fi

'Without further ado, I will now choose my favourite microphone.'

"I'd show you my mini Hi Fi but you just trod on it."

Moving van unloading huge speakers.

Mom & Pops General Store - Free Hi-Fi

Soft Speaker, Loud Speaker, Deafening Speaker

"WOW...this 50.1 theatre sound system makes you feel you're actually in the movie!"

"I bought these airpods back when they were new to the market and much larger."

"Vinyl records? Actually, wax cylinders are where it's at now."

Behind The Music: Grannies House

"Not exactly what I'd call awesome feedback, dude."

"Those must be the old-school, wearable speakers you were talking about."

"You're hearing is fine. It's the noise-canceling headphones that are the problem."

"Between the loud exhaust system and 18 speaker audio, you won't hear the screams of the people you crush..."

Woofer - subwoofer.

I was convicted of disturbing the peace. I refused to turn down the woofer. My pleas for leniency fell on deaf ears.

'I wish those kids would keep the noise down, I can't even hear myself think!'

'Big audio gear is coming back!'

'From albums to 8-tracks to cassettes to CD's...What a long, loud trip it's been!'

An Audio Technician's Pocket Knife

Wow, is that the new lithotripter? No, it's the new Dolby surround sound system, with extra-tech woofers.

#$&*!!! hearing aid!!!

"There is nothing wrong with our sound levels!!" "Can you speak up a bit? We can�t hear a word your saying..."

'Doctor, I just can't seem to relate to my audio equipment these days.'

Large hi fi.