Attending Garden Shows T-Shirts

Prize vegetables with rude names.

Prize vegetables.

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

Champagne

"But all it's playing is Mussorgsky's 'pictures at an exhibition'."

"Apparently he only uses fugitive colours."

"I collect art. Or trash, depending on your point of view."

"So you're an investor who dabbles in art? I happen to be an artist who dabbles in money."

Gardener of the Year.

Mrs. Fergensun unfortunately was crushed before getting what would surely have been a prize winning tomato to the county fair.

"I like your garden humans"

'Apparently he's the first to have copied this particular idea.'

'I really admire his work.'

'I can't spend the afternoon with you guys, my wide wants me to help her in the garden: It's full of sea-weeds...'

"I just paint what I see."

Titan Arum

"This painting should be removed! It's way too saucy!"

'There's nothing he likes better than pulling on an old pair of trousers and pullover and getting stuck in to the Gardening Programme.'

'Now don't you dare get drunk before the performance! We've waiting six months to see this show!'

"It's a rockery...next year we're putting in a water feature."

"Of course it's latex. It's for display purposes only."

Local Art Show

Miss of Garden.

'The Santa vacancy has been filled but we may have something for you in the Roof Garden...'

'I think Ms. Ives wins hands down for the oddest shaped vegetable.'