Attending First Baseball Game T-Shirts

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

'Wow! That was some world series, Ella! Both Pujols and Holland were just amazing...'

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

350 Feet.

Perils of the double play.

Political Candidates' Playbook Signals from the sidelines

"My wife wanted to see a diamond. So I took her to a ballgame."

Bases loaded, no outs. And coach once again turns to his trusty golden reliever.

"Think of me as the designated sitter."

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

"Are there any here today who feel this union is not in the best interests of baseball?"

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

Vendor selling testosterone.

'OK, now let's switch places.'

"They'll be expecting adagio. Go with the allegro."

"Try letting the ball come to you."

Goodbye Opiate of the Masses

Extra innings.

Monster Baseball

"Got him up at the stadium, Chief. It was Yankee Duck Day."

Official Team Cap With Beard

'Here is is. 'Vicarious: imagined participation in another's experience' ... it doesn't mean you actually get to play on your son's team.'

"We would have won if it hadn't been for the other team."

'I'll take the one on the right.'

'Watch out, Dewey! Cow pie!'

'He's not a skilled pitcher. In fact, he throws like a nerd...'

"Did you honestly expect our couples therapist to know when Jacoby Ellsbury will be off the disabled list?!"

'The meat of their order is coming up.'

"Easy on the fast balls, will you, kid?"

Baseball.

'God, quick! Give me the gift of the gab.'

Stadium. No fans allowed. In baseball, "shutout" now has two meanings.

"Get the meat loaf—I hit it out of the park today."

Baseball Dreams