Atheist Philosopher Pillows

"I know what I look like. But I'm an atheist, and I reject your theocentric nomenclature."

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

'I'm an atheist!'

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"Actually, I think it's a cluster of SCUD missiles heading our way!"

"I understand the allure of religion. It offers hope in a world that's often cruel and unfair. But religion's promises have been consistently proven false. Science, on the other hand, has actually delivered the things that improve human life...."

What if Huckabee Were a Fundamentalist Hindu?

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

The Church of DanaeDanaeism: 'And let such sacrilege go uncontested? Never! I demand equal time for alternate explanations of things.'

"The answer you seek can be found in the syllabus."

"I may have wasted my life, but at least I don't look stupid."

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

"Are you sure it's okay for cardinals to live at a Protestant church?"

'I was on my way to Heaven, when they stumbled across my blog...'

"Nonsense - we're far less religious than you are."

"I would cite you to the Apostle Paul and his lear and wise command in Romans 13, to obey the laws of the government because God has ordained the government for his purposes."

Priest

'Kill all the Canaanites? -- Won't that set a bad precedent?'

'Look at all of God's children. Then again, they might be just thousands of tiny, little circles.'

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

"Our cat is the only god this home needs."

Out for lunch... GOD

"I don't think so."

"So Jesus, what denomination are you?"

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

"Well, son, in a way, I suppose Jesus was a trust-fund baby."

Religion, This End Up

'I propose a day of mild exasperation in response to Richard Dawkins.'

"What do you mean, 'There can be no ethics without fear of God'?! Look at me - all ethical and shit!"

Catholic-Protestant Debates....

'What did you say? 'The light is nothing but an ordinary streetlamp'? Oh no! My own son is an atheist??!'

'I really hope that Fred makes the most of it until she joins him for the rest of eternity!'

Atheist United - A Non-Prophet Organization

"And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin..."

"I just reviewed your life...Here's your handbasket."