Astro Comedian Pillows

'It's Howard Schultz calling. Does newly discovered planet Kepler 186F have an atmosphere suitable for a starbucks.'

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

You too?! I go around feeling half asleep all the time also!

"Houston, we have a problem."

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

"Up here, light is neither a particle nor a wave. It's a liquid."

"Remember when we used to wonder if there other beings somewhere out there?"

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'You caught it, you gut it!'

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

'I don't know which was prettier - the meteor shower or the cascade of flaming space junk.'

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

'Gravity...Go figure!'

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"I've heard that seeing the earth from outer space can really change your perspective. I couldn't agree more."

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

Science fiction fans on other planets

Neil Armstrong Outtakes

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

The Origins of Everything

"It's just one bad review and we all know who wrote it."

"I thought the cake came out awfully dense."

'Looks like somebody needs to lay off of the authentic angel food cake!'

"Sir, a bunch of bald-headed, castrated humanoids wearing Nikes just materialised with their luggage back there."

Shoot For The Moon

'No not there. Let's try it over here this time...'

Alien flies in a spaceship out of a postbox.