Aspiring Speedster Pillows

"Believe me. No matter how many self help books you read, you will never become a formula one car."

Radar Gun Readings at Baseball Stadium

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

'That's hydroplaning for ya.'

"This car is very fast and very expensive. Just how bad is your midlife crisis?"

'We're all getting older ok!' 'These days I'm down to the speed of sound!'

'Hey guys?. . . Help us think what Dale could do for his '15 minutes of fame.''

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

"Well, come on Son, don't keep us in suspense. Did you pass your driving test?"

'Hey! I just started my James Patterson novel and I'm on chapter 97!' 'You read 20 pages already?'

Charlie's medical advice always went in one ear and out the other.

'When you talk about playing, 'at the next level', you mean lawyering, right, not the NBA?'

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

"To be honest, it just collects dust."

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

You observed me speeding? Are you familiar with the Heisenberg uncertainty principle?

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up... Can I have your autograph please?'

'When I grow up, if I don't become a pro basketball player, about about 'spin doctor'?'

Graduate

"Coach said I can be catcher if I gain 30 pounds."

"I promised myself I would never let this happen to me."

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."

A Young Indoor Cyclist

'Pull it over, Speedy.'

New Years Resolutions: Join Gym. . .Cancel Gym.

'Jeff! You need to keep one foot on the ground!'

Always stick to the script.

Spin Dentistry...'Hollywood, here I come...'