Artistic Eccentric T-Shirts

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

Benjamin Britten.

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'Oh, Arthur...You sweet, blind, mad, dear, silly fool....Don't you see it could never last?'

Newt sale

"Of course they're permanent. I'm an artist."

"Avant-garde jazz hands"

Man finishing painting through flap in door.

Texturing the Walls

"Sorry - He's changed His mind again. Stripes on the zebra, spots on the giraffe, no stars on the lion and make the elephant bigger and the amoebae smaller."

Interpretive napping

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

"Somehow, some way, we have to guide these people back to reality!"

'Don't you ever knock?'

"Cliff's really devoted to his art. He'll wait hours for someone to take a shot to the groin."

A man looking askance at a child on a tank-like skateboard

Weight lifter using his foot to take a photograph.

"My two-year-old actually did paint that."

"I didn't have a carrot so I used a fish stick for his nose."

'He swallowed some of his acrylic paints and now he's artsy fartsy.'

A dog whose nose is a gun.

"Well, that's right. It is a disco ball. The regular lamp is in the shop."

'Yes, yes, Rupert, you are still a mighty hunter. Now, please bring the turkey back to Luisa in the kitchen.'

"I see the radiator's Baroque again."

Modern Art 'D Hirst' and 'A Nutter'

Award-Winning Photographer.

'This elusive self-portrait of the artist is perhaps his most famous work. It was purchased, by the museum, for one hundred and ninety million dollars and is now valued at 900 million dollars...'

'Hope you don't mind the boxing gloves. I'm no good at hands.'

'Allow me to suck the electricity out.'

'Dr. Nackschmerz has a very logical mind.' - 'Yes - in contrast to his body.'

"Ok, let's sneak up on Mr. Canvas and see if we can make a good impression."

"It's ok for you! My cartoonist just can't adapt to his new varifocals!!"

"I'm sure it's illegal to pose as a police officer"

Tom Waits.

A Macaroni in 1773