Art Installation Explorer T-Shirts

"It's okay, fellahs - only another bloody statue of Gormley by Gromley!"

"You've got a long, long road ahead of you, young man."

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Personally, I'm a doer."

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

Rodin's Browser

Kid doing cave paintings

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

Convenience.

The Cremaster Cycle

'Sophie has discovered Gehry.'

"It has great depth, realized with such a unique economy of paint application... yet, there remains a curious aura of drivel I can't dismiss."

""Stop fidgeting. This is supposed to be a still-life."

'It's like a piece of music, like Mozart or Beethoven.'

Maria Sibylla Merian

Mammoth Posing

Giacometti's less famous 'Man Walking Dog'

"Are my breasts AI? No! My cartoonist would never use AI!"

After three days the curator decided it was probably upside down.

Jackson Pollock's brief career with the highway department

Cover story: Picasso

"I can write, but I can't draw."

(Gallerie Martorelli) (Art-Babble spoken here)

'I can't tell the kitch from the schlock any more.'

'Of course this makes your old masters al look now so very contrived.'

"Have we looked as though we know what it is, for long enough yet?"

Antiques

"But is it content?"

'...And here's one of the artist's earliest paintings.'

The Big Picture

Millais - Cubist Period

'So colour is this artist's vocabulary huh! Well his language is to colourful for me!'

Don't give up the hunting and gathering.

Abstract portrait art.