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Servicemen.

'I've got an amoeba here who wants to go to Officer's Candidate School.'

Banting in the Yeomanry

'Arnold, blow the whole depot, then hightail it out of here.'

"I've never liked 'im - he's an attention seeker!"

Remounts for the Yeomanry

'WOW! Did anyone see the recoil on this baby?'

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

'Hamster Swat Team.'

Small Ads. For Sale :- 'Navy Pram'.

'Being a Drill Sergeant isn't s tough - all you got to know is how to count to four.'

'We have GOT to find a new squadron name!'

"General, last night while we were here, encamped for concert tickets, the enemy encamped across the river for theatre tickets."

'My doctor tells me I have medal poisoning.'

'When did 'At Ease' become 'Chill'?'

I told you rust would set in if you went out in this weather.

'Fill up your tank, sir?'

“Sarge, could you please stop trying to hold my hand!”

Panzer Hut.

Boot shiner puts a smiley on a policemen's boot.

Brooklyn.

"It's a great extra recruiting tool. Those who know they can't live up to that quickly disappear."

'Here's a field can opener, you may need it to cut yourself out of your tank.'

Soldier.

'Lose those unsightly man boobs - JOIN THE US MARINES!'

Jealous of a statue.

"Ever get the feeling you're in the wrong army?"

"Great News - we've secured an MOD contract to supply the Falklands Defence Force!"

'This could be a swell time to buy our selves out!'