Argument Ninja Pillows

A man issues a knock-out blow in an argument,

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"The meeting will come to order."

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

"What if he's bluffing? What if he's not? What if the room just gets too hot?"

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

"Oh dear...I don't think negotiations are going too well..."

"But I see you're having difficulty following my argument."

'He's ruthless and greedy... so let's make sure he's on our side.'

'Three weeks of brutal alimony negotiations, Polly, and you settle for a cracker!'

'Why are you arguing? The customer is always right, you know! 'But he called you a crook!'

"We offer 104 vacation days...otherwise known as weekends."

'Make them a four billion dollar takeover offer, but don't cause a fuss.'

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

'I'm interested in your job opening, so I'll have my agent give you a ring!'

'I'm 60-40 in favor of the 60.'

Okay, I'll admit I was wrong. But I won't say what I was wrong about.

"He'll never win this negotiation. He's saddled with numbers...but we have anecdotes."

"Is this about your raise?"

'I hope you made the prospect say no three times before you gave up.'

Mediation Process

'This is a business lunch, Lowden. So, don't even think about enjoying yourself.'

'I took your advice and told him either I get a raise or I quit!'

"Your answers sound rehearsed."

'Watch it...I'm carrying a concealed weapon...my lawyer.'

'He started it!'

'There's enough of us...we can take them!'

'What can we do about this leadership course?'

'A hostile takeover just wasn't feasible, so we agreed to a hostile merger.'

'I need a lot of trunk space.'