Appointment Misser T-Shirts

"Sorry, this is the Department of Wrong Places. You want the Bureau of Missed Appointments way-y-y-y-y-y-y down the hall."

Face painting.

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

Why would birdie need newspaper?

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

'I sense we might be having a problem with our appointment scheduling.'

'Or you can rent by the week...'

Hair Traffic control.

'You know that bottle of ink that was standing on the desk...?'

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

'Happy now?'

'This is my natural habitat.'

'Hey! Make sure those boots are muddy before you set foot in here,mister! Took me all morning to get this place filthy!'

'...and this is the Mess.'

'I didn't want to get the napkin messy.'

"That's the last time I invite the boys round..."

Untidy bedroom

"Some people say you can't put a price on a wife's twenty-seven years of loyalty and devotion. They're wrong."

The life-changing magic of shoving everything into a huge Hefty bag and leaving it for somebody else to deal with.

"We should take life one step at a time." "OK, but not right now...there's some dogs do-do right in front of us!"

Nycole Turmel: I can call Jack anytime for advice!

Irritable gentleman disturbed by a bluebottle

No, I seriously doubt a DNA test would exonerate you.

"Lactose started it, but now it's mainly me she can't tolerate. . ."

"You give Sticky Keys a new meaning."

"Follow up appointment... the doctor will be retired by then."

"I cancelled my last appointment without phoning the Doctor... so I'm making up for it by showing up without phoning!"

'I don't know what's wrong with you, you seem to have celibacy on the brain!'

"Can I help it if my pen leaks!"

"It was my imaginary friend Gravity."

"One day, many years from now, we'll look back at this and laugh."

'That's it boy! Find the floor!'

Man throwing food on floor in the excitement of a goal