Apostrophe Authority T-Shirts

"Grammar-police, sir, we have some questions about your online posts and the inappropriate use of apostrophes."

Trial by Media

Punctuation Police

Unto thee shall pass the executive laser pointer. Take this authority and delegate it.

"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever

"Recess is over, Your Honor."

Tomato's, Cucumber's, Apostrophe's.

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

The court freezes my assets and wants me to live on $20K per month? They want me to starve!

"I've never liked 'im - he's an attention seeker!"

Coming to a consensus.

Complaining about poor grammar

Continental marshal

"They're really more like a bucket list."

'All right. Who's in charge around here?'

'Please Miss, why does 'Earl's Court' have an apostrophe but 'barons Court' doesn't?'

The boss is always right.

Bureau of Disappearing Civil Liberties

When PJ says no, that's the end of it!

Apostrophe, Aopstropher, Apostrothem.

"To become a department manager you've got to radiate authority and self-confidence! Authority! Self-confidence!!! Got me??!"

"I like things to be done my way but by somebody else."

'Without the comma, colons and semi-colons would rise up to oppress us.'

REPENT, 'Hey! -- Go find your own corner!'

A'sk me about my problem with apo'strophe's.

"Nice touch, Jenkins. I like a man who salutes."

"Ya gotta obey the rules otherwise there's anarchy!"

Panel with Experts to be broken in case of emergency

'Hey! Who stole my stamp of grudging approval?'

Power: 'It's mine and you can't have it.'

'Let's play school. I'll be the principal and you be the teacher, or you be the principal and I'll be the superintendent.'

"No, she likes me best!"

'You know what I like about being the boss? I can take as long as I like to make a snap decision.'

Boy teasing a guard

'Honey, why do you always put me int he rear seat of you patrol car when you give me a lift home?'