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My Bookshelf Before the Internet

Crowded Ice Fishing

"Needs to get a life"

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'

"You dropped yer wallet."

"Sitting here with you each day at sunset reminds me I have to get a job."

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

The Male Atom: Sex, Sport, War and Good Intentions.

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

Max Weber

'When you invented vegetables, Sir, did you know that my mother would be able to fit them all into one garden?'

'Sometimes, in the stillness and warmth of an afternoon sun, I can almost hear interest compounding.'

"Is this as good a bad time as any other bad time you've experienced?"

'Naughty? Nice? Santa, I don't deal in absolutes.'

Prepper Dog

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

"It's Eden. You don't have to keep checking for ticks."

"Oh no, not another pandemic!"

Telling Self to Buzz Off

'I can't shake off this feeling we're being watched.'

"Have you tried turning off your conscious mind and then turning it back on again?"

'Yes sir, Thoreau had the right idea.'

'I checked my symptoms on the internet and I think I might be dead!'

'Do you get the feeling we're being watched?'

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

'Well, that brings us up to my third birthday...'

Fish sleeps while counting worms that jump over a fence.

That's no big deal, a lot of people get Siskel and Ebert mixed up