Anti-social Hermit Pillows

'I know living on an abandoned nuclear test site has its advantages - no bugs, no snakes, no univited guests but did it ever occur to you that there's nothing else here either?'

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

"That's the worst case of Cabin Fever that I've ever seen. Luckily, spring is right around the corner."

"Apparently, he's been trapped in his cubicle since 1944. Do you want to tell him World War II is over, or shall I?"

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

"Sorry, I don't really believe in being social offline."

"I'm kind of a big deal in antisocial media."

"Me: I never get invited to anything Also me: Sorry, I'm so tired, think I'll stay in."

"I'm off the grid."

Hello- I'm a Wreck.

Castaway Drummer

"I haven't seen you in ages - have you not been hiding under a rock?"

"There are easier ways to get time to yourself, Ed."

"Burton, Fenton and Hacwood. Sorry, Mr. Hackwood is away, taking a 'gap' year on top of a mountain."

Learning to read body language, lesson one: 'Leave me alone!'

'Have you got the time?'

'I'm a hermit crab and like it this way, so no, I don't want to join any social network!'

"The universal remote. That's how God rules the universe."

"Thanks for coming - I usually find these office parties rather awkward."

"You can come down now, Milton. The election is over."

"'The party' is our most difficult escape room—you have one hour to get out of a room full of extroverts."

'Make yourselves at home. I'm right here, in the panic room.'

Dining Alone

'It started off as a hobby. Then it became an obsession. Finally, one day she went in there and hasn't been heard from since.'

"How should I know? I've spent my life sitting on a bloody rock!"

Stay back 500 feet

"Some party, huh? Did you try the bean dip? How's the family? Give me a call some time! I want to introduce you to some friends of mine."

"Donald hates visitors."

"Since I hate small talk and I hate big talk, I guess I won't be talking."

"Social networking lets me be social without actually having to be around other people."

'You'll have to excuse Gerald. He's not so much the party animal these days.'