Animal Lover Debate Enthusiast Gifts

"On scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being 'can't live without him', how close were you to the cat?"

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

The Zoo.

"He was overly socialized as a puppy."

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

Seagiraffes

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

'The meek shall inherit the debt. The rich shall inherit the loopholes.'

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

Oligarchy

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"The cat told me to eat your homework."

'The problem is, she's so damn crabby.'

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

Dialogue

Girl wags her pony tail as dog wags his tail.

Boy with a whale: 'He followed me home, Dad, can I keep him?'

"...and your ears! They're like silk purses!"

"First date hairball... awkward."

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'