Animal Humour Enthusiasts Pillows

Nudist Tortoise

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

The americanisation of vulture.

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

'Yeah, I'm sorry to break it to you bud, that eating grass thing is a myth!'

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

"Author does not do tricks."

The only time cats are known to laugh.

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

'Oh Hi!'

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

Great moments in art dogs playing poker, cats playing Pictionary,

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

Bases loaded, no outs. And coach once again turns to his trusty golden reliever.

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

"I can't decide who gets the promotion, so we'll settle it with a rope toy Tug O' War."

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

'Oh don't worry, we had him defanged.'

Where Shaving Cream Comes From

'After years of practicing in empty theaters, Horace's dream of becoming a soft-shoe dancer seemed as remote as ever.'

"Don't listen to her! She's a cuckoo: what would she know about parenting?!"

"Two of every known creature on the planet and you forgot the pooper-scooper?"

"Gazelle's pizza! Delivered fast and delicious... Um, you guys aren't interested in pizza are you!?"

"Hurry up, I'm hungry."

'Knuth! How many times did I tell you not to play with the food??!!'

Cat plays an arcade game that involves shooting at gun into a mouse hole.

"This isn't helping my migraine."

'Ha ha! No kidding! You're pretty much most people's worst enemy.'

"His mother was a poodle and his father was a shoe."

'What happend? I thought you went to the dentist for a cleaning.'

Another Time Travel Pair o' Ducks.

'Sorry lady, can't help you: Yes, I can herd pretty much anything, but not cats, and certainly not kittens...'