Animal Healer Humorist Pillows

'You'll find that Doctor has his own method of dealing with deadbeats!'

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

Hats and Food

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

"Yes, one is a dog."

'Jurassic Pork.'

"Scuba cow"

"Yep. Looks like we have ringworm."

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"Never mind how I got up here....just call the fire department."

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

'Well, I guess we're the control group.'

'The funny part is that the aerial was fine -- the TV set was just unplugged!'

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

No jay walking.

'Mom and dad...if someone threw a rock at me, it would really be like killing two birds with one stone.' 'I told you if we had a child, he'd be a wise-quacker.'

"I'm concerned. You seem to have catlike reflexes."

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

Northeastern Deer/Southwestern Deer

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

"Did you know he'd joined a squirrel watchers club?"

'Settle an argument. Which is better incessant barking or meowing?'

"You might want to start bringing more carrots home, dear. I think I have an ingrown hare."

"I think I'm beginning to embrace humiliation."

'Bird Watching is fun, but it tends to make me salivate...'

"Hey! There's a hair in my soup!"