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'If you ask me, Inspector, it's a classic case of 'curiosity killed the cat'...'

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

Barks in code.

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

Murder in Apartment 6-K

"And I'll have that lightly sedated, please."

'So who needs sonar?!'

"Hello? Is that the canine help line?...."

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

'The word bath is mentioned.'

Sergeant Jones gave the assurance that they had an 'assortment' of leads back at the station. . .

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

Man to pets about upside down house: 'I don't care who started it!'

"What's all this?"

"Look, I tried to tell everyone Timmy was in the well but no, what do I know, I'm just a dog!"

"Don't make me send in the bad cat."

'I got 397 dead birds and the mayor breathing down my neck. So, is this our perp or just another copycat?'

"If you could live your life all over again, what dead animals would you roll in?"

"Now how did she know?"

"You're not a police dog, and that's not a crime scene."

"My client was across town at the time of the murder, as a quick sniff of Exhibit A will demonstrate."

'Where my balls go?'

"If anyone should ask, I was in my doggy bed from 7 p.m. to midnight. Understand?"

"That's why I don't use those dog carriers."

'This article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that.'

"Listen, that's a Tang Dynasty urn we just broke."

"I take it you want to go for a perp walk."

"Officer, my cat's stuck up a tree again"

"The guy I bought him from says he's a pure sheepdog."

"I had no idea. You mean I'm a dog?"

Vet to angry-looking dog: 'You ate some crabgrass, eh? Were you self-medicating again?'