Animal Comedy Pillows

Maude had warned the Cat not to lick itself so much.

"Fuhgettaboutit, Charley. Ya been fixed."

'Let's do the Good Dog, Bad Dog routine.'

Chicken CSI.

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"No no, I said sit!!"

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

"Do me next."

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

"Yes, it's oil-paint: It's difficult to find water for watercolours around here..."

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

Cat croissant, cat baguette, cat muffin, cat turnover

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

Hats and Food

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

'Jurassic Pork.'

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

Snowmobull

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

"Yes, one is a dog."

Hey. Hey. Polly wants some folly.

"Scuba cow"

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

His Master's Thesis.

'Oh, oh, a pack of dogs! Stand still amd maybe they won't notice us.'