Animal Caretaker With A Sense Of Humor Pillows

'Every time we go out for a steak dinner, Sander thinks he recongnizes...

"Foster failure"

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

Dog Dressed to Eat

"This resumé has the kind of sizzle we're looking for."

Pin the blame on the donkey.

"And I suppose you expect me to pick that up?"

"We're slapping you with a stress suit, pal!"

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

'Hon, can you fill the dog's water dish?'

'They sure have small litters.'

With Wally the hermit crab showing no signs of life, Shirley yields to her kids' pleas and performs mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

Dog Food

"I'm sixty three in human years and the mother of octuplets. Again."

"He ran out of pee."

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

'Where did the little bird go?'

Dog wearing a cone around his waist: 'Hemorrhoids.'

'Do you realize he barked all last night?'

"Your dinner's on the table and yours is under the table."

'My dad must like you, or he would have charged by now.'

"Tom, did you forget to feed the pets tonight?"

Horse Clean-up

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

The Shepherd's Staff. . .

"Yes, it is a beautiful day but what makes you think you can go outside and play?"

'In ancient Egypt, cats were treated like gods and in this house, it's pretty much the same: Come in friend...'

"You stop it, now!"

"Careful, Len. You'll spook the herd."

"Bad Dog!!! You can't trust those chocolate labs."

'Word to the wise: Always check the cheese for pills.'

'Your disgusting behaviour has been almost human in nature!'

Meals on Wheels/Wheelie Bins

'I do some light mousework for them in return for room and board.'

Stand-up comedy while you're away at work. 'What's the deal with fetching? ...And they expect you to run and go get it, so why did they throw it in the first place?' 'Ha! Ha! It's funny because it's true!'