Animal Advisor T-Shirts

"You'd like a second opinion? Okay, I think you should stay off the furniture too."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

Brian was very proud of his dog.

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

'How many times have I told to seize the day before it seizes you?'

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

Cat and dog at a will reading.

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

Armstrong, the only doctor covered in the new health plan you got me is a veterinarian! Beats no coverage. Yeah, if you're a parakeet. You're so cheap. You don't value me at all. You ingrate. I didn't have to give you health benefits. Lots of employers don't cover their animals. You mean workers. Stop your barking.

The Golfing Accident

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for the day. Teach a man to fish and you can charge a consulting fee."

"Lenny?" "Darrell?"

dog vs UFO...

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

I'm not saying I'm not a hound dog. I'm saying I'm not nothing but a hound dog.

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

"I've told you why I need a dog. Now suppose you tell me what makes you think you might be that dog."

'Answer these constituents letters. Tell them to go to hell in a nice way.'