Anger Master Gifts

"I'm going to put you on hold for a few minutes...to see if you totally lose it."

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

'The anger management is working... tonight there were fewer veins popping.'

Fragile stamper.

'And with this one I scored 138 not out...every one off the edge.'

Ice Fly-Fishing with Doug

'You've come a long way with your anger this year. In fact, I feel that you are ready to meet a special friend of mine...'

"Thanks to our self-driving car, Fred channels all his road rage energy into doing chores around the house!"

Last Road Rage Therapist for 500 Miles

"You dumb clod! Do you realize you're almost two minutes late?"

'I told you he had a temper.'

A Wally Yomp Psychologist...Practice limited to people who are really miffed!

'The driving on that game is simulated, but the road rage is real.'

'Right! That's bloody it! I'm calling for the wife-whisperer.'

"Sit in the car. The doctor will be with you shortly to treat your road rage."

'What's that supposed to mean!?!'

Man fights with his shadow.

Anger Management Classes.

"This is a computer rage management class. Road rage management is next door."

'My name is Helda, and I have a tendency to fly off the handle.'

'This is a song my therapist told me to sing whenever I get the urge to harm people who won't pay attention to me.'

'The floods, the pestilence, the plagues...don't you think you could find more constructive ways to express your wrath?'

"I've only seen him wound up like this once before, and that time, when he finally DID relax, he shredded the couch to pieces."

"I wasn't angry until you kept harping on it. . . now I want to come over there and punch your lights out!"

Road Rage Venting Center (next exit)

'Well, Carrie, it's great that you were able to express some of those repressed emotions!'

"It's only a game, according to my psychiatrist."

"You think you're angry? I'll show you angry!"

'I like your look, Philbin. I'm moving you from middle, anger management to upper, anger management.'

'If I were you, I'd stop watching 'Fox News' altogether.'

Anger Management.

Road-rage speedometers.

Shortfuse psychology...making anger work for you!

"Relax, release and let go...."

"If you follow my ten-step program, you'll be able to channel your anger better and become a more efficient predator..."