Angelic Lore Lover Pillows

"You spend your whole life trying to get to the Heavenly Kingdom, only to discover they already have a king."

'Oh dear, another fallen angel - blast this hole in the ozone layer.'

'So that's why I didn't get that train set? !'.

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

'Count Dracula, I wish you'd come to me sooner...'

"I know winter gets ugly, but this is ridiculous!"

"This is Heaven, you idiot. Everything's perfect. There is no suggestion box."

The Headless Horseman claims his luggage.

'Don't sweat it - We grade on the curve.'

'Please hold for an eternity...'

Smashed harp...

Mermaids

"We've come here for the martinis, we've always come here for the martinis."

'... And the last thing I remember saying was, 'It oughta be a sin to look this good.''

'I'm Smallfoot, Bigfoot's cousin!'

Death of the pope.

'Apparently my ex's idea of heaven was to punch me in the eye.'

'We spent centuries refining our eyes of newt and bat wing potion, and now we're expected to give it away for free?'

"No prizes for guessing who's been sucking up to the boss!"

'I would have taken it with me but the Inland Revenue got it all before I left.'

'He's been like that since he pulled the sword out of the stone.'

"Damn! - They've just raised my retirement age to 1,250...!"

'Actually we were hoping for someone on drums.'

"Our planet has run out of cocaine."

'They were all out of wings.'

'You won't find much use for that, most celebrities go to the other place.'

'See, Harry? I am holier than thou.'

Dragons look at map that says 'You be here.'

Tsunami aftermath.

'Voyeur!'

'Most of us choose the wings. Fred picked the hat.'

"I was a used-car salesman, but I was terrible at it."