Angelic Explorer Pillows

"I hear they're desperate for new users."

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

"Oh, this? It's just my copy of '1,001 Places to See Now That You're Dead'."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

"And these are the Fab Four Noble Truths."

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

"Home depot."

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

"Honey, I’ve found God!"

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

'You must heal yourself.'

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

We're willing to flee temptation, if we can leave a forwarding address.

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

FAQs.

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

Christian and Born again Christian...

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

'St. Joseph's Church,today's sermon, the road to heaven (free maps)'

The Path

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

"All the celebrities come here."

"Did you have a cat?"

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

"I understand the allure of religion. It offers hope in a world that's often cruel and unfair. But religion's promises have been consistently proven false. Science, on the other hand, has actually delivered the things that improve human life...."

"The answer you seek can be found in the syllabus."