Angelic Debate Champion Pillows

'Isn't it heaven to always be right...'

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

"We've discovered they mate for life, as long as they don't discuss politics."

"The derby is better. That makes you look like Abraham Lincoln."

"Everyone stay calm, if we don't upset it maybe it won't start shooting."

The Government's Got Your Back. And Wants Your Front As Well.

'His idea of campaign finance reform is insisting on small bills.'

"....So called 'fake news' is dangerous to our democracy!"

You don't believe I could be a supreme court justice! You're ruining my self-esteem! F.Y.I? � Whiny tirades don't look good on a supreme court justice's record. Thank you for your candid assessments. I will certainly consider their merits. Fine judicial temperament. And reject them for their shallow insensitivity! Rejection overruled.

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

'What's the difference? Some people call it privatizing government. Others call it super pacs buying congressmen.'

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Let me connect you with Edith, our specialist in ethnic conflict in the former Yugoslavia. My expertise happens to be in North Korean intransigence."

Saint Peter will sometimes put on a disguise just to play a prank on the new arrivals.

America Finally Solves the Gun Problem

"An excellent defense. Let's give her the doctorate."

Healthcare declaration

A young positivist.

'I don't get it, Victoria. . . why are men in control of everything?'

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

"So—who are you angry at currently?"

Yale makes better lock than rival Harvard.

"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"

Children arguing over the name of a fish

I know time is an earthly construct, but I still feel sleepy in the afternoons.

'If you have to ask, you can't afford it.'

"People, the facts are inescapable. Any ideas on how we can ignore them?"

'There are no stupid questions, so let's also agree there are no stupid answers.'

'I've changed my mind...I want to grow up to be a politician.'

"This swamp is much too beautiful to drain.".

"Hey...Didn't we build that?"

'I got tattoos to make a statement, but my teacher said I could do the same thing by joining the debating team.'

"Soy latte for 'Actually Frankenstein is the doctor I don’t have a name.'"