Ancient Steps Tracker Pillows

'I wonder if they're gonna build me one when I die?'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

"10,000 steps...just answering doorbells."

"It was a slow day - my pedometer says I only put in 1, 273, 426 steps."

"The bad news is I didn't get any food. The good news is I got my 100,000 steps in."

Heart Health Levels

"10,000 steps a day? I can do that."

"A hacker logged into my fitness tracker and stole my steps!"

"Obama planted it."

"Better get a move on, only 1,314,000 steps till Christmas."

"It was a slow day - my pedometer says I only put in 1,273,426 steps."

"Aw, geez... I thought I took more hops than that today."

"Nurse, I'll be right back. My activity tracker says I've got to take a walk."

I add 1,000 steps every day just going back to my car to get the mask I was supposed to put on."

"Here's the problem, I grabbed the wrong map. This isn't the Fountain of Youth. This is the Fountain of Middle Age."

Wait, you took how many steps?

"The only way I lost a few ounces with my activity tracker was when I took it off."

"I got one of those new crystal ball fitness trackers-- it tells me all my future steps."

"Darn - zero steps again."

"We gave every employee the latest fitness tracker wristband. It helps them keep tabs on our 35-step-per-day limit."

Klytaemnestra

Could I go back and forth a few times first? I've almost got my steps in for today.

"Want to know how many steps we took?"

"When I said you should take a walk every day I didn't just need to see me!"

Dancing

"I'll read the will."

"Don't you ever switch off from the 10,000 steps challenge Graham?"

"The real torture is not being able to get my steps in."

Ok, ok, if that's what you need to meet your daily goal, we can do 21 paces instead.

Confused Tourists

"It's an Apple watch I use it to count my step."

"My doctor wants me to walk a mile after every meal. But frankly, ten miles a day is killing me."

'All the trains are knackered today... so get walking you lazy gits!'