Ancient Mythology Enthusiast Gifts

'Careful Sire, it might contain lead.'

"He's good with crops, but slow to respond in an emergency."

'Everybody will remember the Spartans! Nobody will want to believe that democracy was saved by Thespians.'

'There goes Claudius in his new All-Terrain-Vehicle.'

Shepherd and eurydice

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

'If you were disturbed by any issues raised, please call your mum.'

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

Couple looking at the statue of Eros by moonlight.

Tut and Carmen.

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

Venus

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

Bacchus.

Vlad the Impala

'I used to commute. Now I transform.'

'Where was the TSA?'

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

Lesser known greek gods,

Lady of the bath...

Here be dragons.

Voice coming from wooden horse: 'Quiet Fanshaw! If this hostile take-over bid is going to work we've got to get right inside the boardroom.'

Iliadette.

Neptune

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

Warrior Woman

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

“...And on the ninth day God created mosquitoes, just to annoy the hell out of everyone.”

"He conquered the known world - now all he's got is sudoku."

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."