Ancient Language Learner Gifts

Hey What you trying pull That not a word yet

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

This is a 'text book' it's a bit like a website but printed on paper.

"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

"You can use the alphabet to text. You can use the alphabet to tweet. Why can't you use the alphabet to spell?"

With the aid of a tactical dictionary, and was finally able to make sense of what the salesman was saying.

Man embarrassed by a schoolboy's superior knowledge of Greek

How's your nephew doing in human school this year? Great! He has a calculator and spell checker like last year, and this fall new features have been added. With new translation software he can take language classes now, and for social studies he just clicks "history." Bonjour! I'm so proud! He has the school's highest G.P.A.! Other students can't copy off him anymore because he started using encrypted code. His favorite upgrade is the enhanced ability to process school lunches. He's bee

Sharing the Bed with Zeno

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

"Is it (eye symbol) before (water symbol) or (water symbol) before (eye symbol)?"

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

IMHOtep

'- and what makes you think they must have been TALL?'

"Baldo, Gracie...you need to learn more Spanish. For the rest of the week, I'm going to speak nothing but Spanish, and Tia Carmen will act as your interpreter, OK? Tienen tarea?"

"You got a D in English and an E in French, but Swedish isn't a problem?!"

'Exams were harder before the Renaissance.'

Illegal Immigrants

'It appears to be a kosher for Passover recipe.'

"I want to make a wish, but the problem is that this genie apparently does not speak English."

"I can never remember, does 'barge' have one snake-head jackal, or two?"

I'm not sure which, but he's just invented either writing or vandalism.

Academic Boogie Down - 'Once you've taught Sanskrit, there is no going back to Caligula.'

I see we have the same summer reading list. ABC.

'My French is not so good.'

"How can a student who can't speak English or Gobbledegook expect to pass?"

'He's so clever he's learning a second language!'

'Apparently, there's some sort of language barrier for me when money talks.'

Mass Confucian

'I invested in a completely new economic system for the country, but the instructions are in japanese.'

"Are you sure they'll be able to read English?"

"Omnipotent?! I thought you said impotent. And you're out of wished, too."

"The fact that you rely on a teleprompter is a good indication that you need to work on your communication skills."

Why don't we invite Hypothesis? It's always a good idea to have an educated guest… Party List. Mesomides. Loxias. Anaximenes. Thales.