Ancient History Gifts

"I completely forget why we're making him do that."

The First Writer and Editor: 'Take out that part?! Are you nuts? How is the stampede scene at the end of the cave going to make sense without it?!'

'What happened between design and development?'

'I like to keep busy. It makes the day go faster.'

'What Caesar doesn't understand is that all politics is local!'

'He lifted two! That beats your world record yesterday of one.'

'Well, the boss did say we would be given a forum.'

'Hippocrates wraps up his first press conference...'

'Gee, I just never get tired of this!'

"Truly a magnificent emperor! While Rome burns, Nero plays an instrument that hasn't been invented yet."

"Man, I hate daylight savings."

Egyptians stuck in position line up to see the chiropractor.

'What did I tell you? - It's time to invent traffic laws.'

Take a break, Archimedes. A nice soak in the bath will work wonders.

Horseback.

"As an animal lover, I find these images disturbing."

'I'm spending all of my money and if the world doesn't end in 2012, I'll make it all back and more by suing the Mayas.'

An early prototype of the Trojan horse.

'Here. Who's going to believe Nero played bongos while Rome burned?'

Saint Paul in a Roman prison cell with Onesimus.

'What do you mean you can't find the key?'

'IV!'

"Whatever happened to collective responsibility?"

AD 64: Another contestant is voted off Rome's top reality show.

"I was miles away - could you start again?"

"Another false start for the Western philosophical tradition."

"Go with Hannibal if you must."

Why Rome Fell:'Peel you a grape? Don't you know that the skin is where all the vitamins are?'

'Enjoying a little 'me time', Narcissus?'

ATM Inside

Egyptian: 'I want you to build a 3-D triangle for the Pharaoh.' Slave says, 'Sounds like some kind of pyramid scheme.'

'This has all the makings of a fable. But first lets take lots of tests.'

'Sure I can put in a wet bar, too.'

'Well this could be a problem.'

'Ever try beating a ploughshare into a sword?'