Analyzing Gifts

"Next time be more careful where you put the decimal point!"

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

"Stock options for your thoughts."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

Fear/Knowledge

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

Light Bulb Moment

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

Reading my Critics

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is none of us will be alive then.'

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"Morning, all!"

Lethal Presentation

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

"Thank you for that summation of the charts."

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

Time Is Money

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."