Amateur Animal Psychologist Gifts

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"This is a great spot to practice mighty roars son..."

"Why do they do that?"

Licensed Therapist

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Dog chews 'The Cat Book'.

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

"Okay, you both know the rules: no trash talk, no batting the other guy all over the house if he’s unconscious, watch the claws and nails..."

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"Lucky, I Said Heel!"

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

"Sure my wings flap 70 times per second-- I've been sipping nectar all day."

Bears catching fish

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

"I think the ants are mooning me again."

'We don't want you poking around here any more!'

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

'I don't know about you. But I'm eating my fill before I drag this carcass to the 'king of the beasts'.'

"No wonder they've spotted us! Tail down Fred, tail down!"

Cat tries to reach a birdfeeder on stilts.

"I sure hope there's something good in here. I worked up quite an appetite getting past that raccoon-proof lid."

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

"Wait—what did I come into this room to do?"

"You're right—there's no such thing as personal space in a hibernaculum."

"I know we've had our differences in the past but if you scratch behind my ears I'll show you where the catnip is kept."

"Yup, pretty sure that was a flying squirrel."

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."