Alternative Seeker Gifts

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

"Good game."

"Ahhh... close enough."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

Remote control pirate bully

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

The fate of the emigrant

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

The experienced backpacker.

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Easter Island legs

Tourists

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

Desert Island Meals.

Beach con-man.

'He's not a pet. He's an endangered species.'

'Cannonball!'

'I think you're getting the hang of it.'

"Look what I found, dad!"

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

A tortoise toboggans down a hill in its shell

Pirate

On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"